Can you really let go?
I have written about this topic, letting go, before (letting-go). This time it’s personal. At least this time I’m aware of it, I should say.
I’ve had some psychosomatic issues recently. It’s quite strange having to experience something like that, when I’m the one that lectures on how the mind works and how we should all be thinking. Nevertheless, it happened and my lower back has been in pain.
So, to resolve it I visited an osteopath. But this guy is not your usual osteopath – he works from the physical to the mental and he mentioned those words as well when he spoke about how tense my muscles are – letting go and the inability to do so. And most of us are in the same situation.
I am, at the moment, like a stiff board rather than, what we all should be, loose and relaxed.
The doc also spoke about the point that when we speak, we don’t really say everything that we want to say; “like clearing out half the wardrobe and leaving the other half as it is” – which is also true for most. This causes us to hold onto negative thoughts and emotions which will eventually affect us.
My reason is that I lack the trust to let go. That’s what I’ve figured out up to now. For now.
I am so much of a perfectionist that I would rather do everything myself – that way I know it gets done ‘right’. It’s the lack of professionalism that I see, a lack of fairness, a lack of compassion in the world around me.
I did it my way
However, the truth is that I want things done a certain way – my way. You could say that it’s an inability to accept being wrong or that I always have to be right and, therefore, I do everything myself. Even if part of this is true, I know, listening to my intuition and heart, that the main reason is that I am a perfectionist.
When I don’t know how to do something I tend to end up not doing it, because, I don’t want to get it wrong. Maybe it is because I don’t like getting things wrong. Now, this, stems from a subconscious belief from childhood – and most of our beliefs tend to be just that; childhood beliefs.
Even my spiritual father told me that I need to let go of that small child within; he obviously saw something that I didn’t.
So I find myself not willing to give it up, to let go. Even to God, because, of all the myths I have been fed, that are still in my subconscious, that a righteous life is one of poverty and giving, that money is the root of all evil and so on. These beliefs are not only wrong, but false (the love of money is the root of all evil – it is when you put money first and your fellow man second) and I still have a few of them.
As for perfection, the thing is, nothing will ever be perfect.
In the military there is a saying – “Even the best laid plans can go to waste”. There are no perfect plans. Perfection is a state of mind that can only be achieved in the mind. In the world around us, in which we create the life we want, there will always be obstacles, failures and setbacks we’ll need to get over until we reach our goal.
The thing is, most of the resistance comes from us. We keep ourselves back, trying to fight or thinking that we’re not fighting, the stream of life. If we just let go we’d probably get there quicker and easier.
We have so many hold-ups, beliefs, disbelief, fears and, at times, a lack of direction, that to get anywhere at all is a miracle in itself. But, if we do have a direction, a goal, a target we want to reach and attain, if we could just let go and trust that all will be as we have imagined and visualised, then things would turn out abundantly glorious.
But we don’t.
The other point that the doc brought up, whilst sticking acupuncture pins in my forehead, chest and feet, is that all this tension causes further reaction. Whether the tension is first mental (stress, worry, fear) it will show up in the body (eczema, rashes, headaches), and the body will respond accordingly.
There are two ways that we get a disconnection between mind and body – one is short and impactful, like a soldier during a firefight; the immediate effect is high awareness, stress and controlled action, practiced again and again.
The other type is chronic and subtle. It builds up slowly and gently over time, leaving no sign until we begin to get those psychosomatic symptoms. These are the result of chronic stress, worry, fear, anger, hate… the list goes on.
The doc works on the body to help the mind, which in turn helps the body… It’s a cycle. And it can go the other way.
A tense body is a result of the negative thoughts, but, start thinking “My body is loose and relaxed”, and knowing that your thoughts affect your physical world, your body will eventually begin to relax. The subconscious will start to believe the affirmation you give yourself until it becomes a belief. How long it takes is up to you and how much you believe that it will happen.
Negative thoughts and feelings, lead to illness, to further negativity…
What have I decided to do?
The solution really is to trust that all things will turn out as you and I have imagined them and visualised. Act in faith that what you want in your life is already here – it simply needs to manifest in your environment.
It doesn’t matter whether you believe it or not. The fact is that this is the way it is. The only reason things don’t turn out the way we want them to is, because, we lose faith and we give up doing what we know we should do to move forward. Accept fear and any other obstacles as part of the process. Then let go and let it happen, all the time continuing to do what you know you must.
For now, what I do know, is that the only way for me to “let go” is to let go. To make it happen consciously by shifting the way I think. That’s what I’m working on now.
Is it easy? NO. All the false beliefs, fears and doubts will come up to the surface and scream at me to “keep control”, which is a falsehood anyway. But it is a choice. And I choose to trust and have faith that all will be as I have seen it in my own mind.
It’s a shift in thought and emotion. A shift in belief. And to do that we have to take a leap of faith!
Faith is the ability to see the invisible and believe in the incredible, and that is what enables believers to receive what the masses think is impossible.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.